Sunday 13 April 2008

A little tale of Poo

Oh lovely it was, just last week, a warm sunny day in April, birds singing, sun shining and all was well with the World – you know the sort of thing.

So there I was out walking the dogs – no one around – breathe out and relax perfect. Then I spied what looked like a tissue. I had to walk right past it so couldn't fail to see it and nooooo it wasn't a tissue. It was a neatly tied white plastic bag full of . . . dog poo . . .yes dog poo, sitting there with great smugness amongst the moss. Eeeeeuuuuooowwwww. It was already sweating in the sun the bacteria inside going rampant in the warmth. Bleah. Ah but wait, maybe the owners of said poo were returning the same way and would be back to retrieve and dispose of the offending article. Comforted that this would be the case I walked on. Pleased that there were people in the world who were thoughtful enough to bag up their dog's poo . . .although burying it would have done. I will point out here that I did not open the bag and investigate – it was obvious enough what was in the bag . . . I do have a life you know.




The next day was chilly and overcast, but ok. The dogs and I set off for our daily walk. And very quickly we encountered another neatly tied bag – black this time – also full of poo . . . Ah well it too was probably waiting to be collected.






Further down the track though we came across bag number one . . .eeeek. Still there and clearly laying claim to its place in our landscape. Berlimey . . . still maybe they would both be collected tomorrow. But no . . . and a week later they are still there. Which led me to thinking WHY!!!! What on earth went through the mind of whoever had done this. They had gone to all the trouble of collecting and bagging up and securing the bag and then . . .just left it there. Was the act of tying the bag the limit of their thought. Or if not, what did they think was going to happen to the bag. Did they imagine the Poo Police would be smartly along to collect it Neeee Naaa Neee Naaaa – thank you kindly sir. Or maybe they had reasoned it was ok to leave them because the bags are bio-degradable. Eeeek the thought of that festering package being eventually released doesn't bear thinking about it. And if that was the thought process that would mean the country side would be littered with neatly tied, bacteria multiplying packages . . . Or maybe they just didn't think . . . but surely there had to be some thought to have taken the doggy bags with them and used them in the first place. Hah this crime would be considered pre – mediated then. I say 'them' because I did come across a non local couple with a small black dog . . . No I didn't ask because they were walking in the 'towards' direction of the poo and at this point I was still hopeful that they might be in return, collect and dispose mode. Sigh . . .nope.

Out in the country side I see no problem with just scooping the poop into a hole and covering it. After all dogs generally try with little success to cover up their 'doings' so I just help things along. Plus there is plenty of poo of various types all over the countryside and I see no point in collecting up my dogs poop in a bag and binning it for someone else to deal with. My dogs, their poo, my problem. Although there is a school of thought that this sort of poo will affect the local ecology and in some areas people are no longer allowed to scatter the ashes of their deceased on the mountains . . .but that is another story.

I would actually love to have an open non-judgemental chat . . .revs chainsaw . . . with someone who has just chucked away their litter in the country side. I genuinely want to know WHY they think it is ok to do this. What do they think is going to happen to their discarded rubbish. There has to be some kind of reasoning even on a subconscious level. Why do people out for a walk in the countryside think it is ok to leave their food packaging and water bottles. Why would they want to spoil the very thing they were surely out to enjoy. I can sort of understand why this can be made ok in towns because there are systems in place for collecting rubbish – supply and demand – although it is still completely wrong. But WHAT is it that makes people wind down their car windows and chuck their rubbish out onto the grass verges, or to stop the car and dump a bin bag by the road side . . . .

Recently someone has gone to the trouble of driving a couple of miles up the track – and it really is just a track – and dumping a load of car tyres . . .er thank you . . . very picture skew. Last year someone dumped a sideboard . . .a little way up the track just off the road . . .mmmmmm. . . One time I caught a white van man trying to dump rubbish in our private bins (they are half a mile from our house at the road end – so rather vulnerable) – Mr van man got quite angry that the bins were locked . . . sigh . . . he was sent very smartly on his way . . .no doubt to dump elsewhere.

And I thought I would leave you with this picture of a car seat sitting out in the middle of the forest . . it has sat where it is for a very long time as you can see by the moss growing on it. Bit of a lateral thinker this one . . .



Maybe someone reading this can enlighten me as to the thought processes that are required to dump rubbish without feeling any guilt . . .and then when I have listened and failed to understand I will introduce TT into the equation.

Monday 7 April 2008

A Testing Time . . .



Yes a testing time in more ways than one. Sorry, sorry couldn't resist the pun. Pun, what pun? Read on!!!!

I went to see my Doctor on Friday. I had received a letter from my consultant and wanted to go and discuss it. In short the consultant was confirming Functional Somatic Disorder (which is an umbrella of conditions – none of which I appear to have) . . . and saying that as far as he was concerned any further investigations into my symptoms would be fruitless . . . and then he waffled on about Cognitive therapy and clinical psychology . . . blah blah . . . .berlimey!

Mmmmm as I read the letter I had cartoon visions of me being casually thrown onto the medical garbage heap, wildly clutching at an umbrella. My feelings are that I don't fit into ME, not really, or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, or anything else under the FSD umbrella. Then again as my previous rheumatologist had said to me when I asked about ME etc – he said oh they are just labels given to people when we don't know what is wrong with them!!!!! Terrific. Interestingly my IBS also under FSD has cleared up since I stopped eating wheat! So there goes another one of those illnesses with no know cause for the symptoms . . . it depends where you look.

So I was a bit wound up when I went in to see the Doctor on Friday. HS came with me – whether to support me, or protect the Doctor from my chainsaw I wasn't sure.

All change . . . we had a long chat with the Doctor and in short he doesn't agree with FSD diagnosis either. He says there is evidence of inflammation in my body (which the consultant denied) and his feeling is that given the fact I already have two autoimmune diseases (Hashimoto's and Dry Eye disease) the likelihood is that I have one or more other autoimmune diseases causing my flu like symptoms. He feels that I need a diagnosis, a prognosis and a way of coping . . .I feel I need wine, chocolate and a roll up. He said there is no point going to another consultant in this area as they will just all agree with each other!!!!! So I am now going to Nine Wells hospital in Dundee to see another Rheumatologist (apparently they deal with most of the autoimmune diseases) for more tests. I have been warned it could be another long haul – more waiting, more tests and yet more waiting and no guarantee that they will be able to find out what is wrong. So may be no further forward at the end of it, but at least my Doctor isn't giving up on me and shoving me under an umbrella on a garbage tip.

We did discuss M.E. - in his view true M.E., not to be confused with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome has symptoms which can be tested for and is a recognisable disease - actually recognised by the World Health Organisation . . . something I know Hopping Moon and Tumbling advocate very strongly, but not all the medical profession treat it as a real disease. He also felt I don't fit into ME or CFS . . . yes I have similar symptoms, but I don't have the extreme fatigue, or muscle weakness and I can mostly walk an hour every day which ME and CFS sufferers can't . . . I talked about my concern about my shrinking world and he has suggested that he sends me to see a clinical psychologist to help me deal with what is going on . . .yup love clinical psychologists – I wanted to be one. He also said that it was a vicious downward spiral ie if you go out and feel unwell then you will be less keen to go out next time. True. But I used to find that if I pushed through my symptoms I was ok . . . then over the months I have become less and less ok and yes now I am wary of going out . . . not sure it is a downward spiral though, just that I am actually feeling unwell when I go out. Tricky one. Having said that I have just booked up with Wizzard to go to the Scottish Finals of the SCDA One Act Play in Inverness for three days – so I won't give up pushing the boundaries. Interestingly my Doctor said he didn't believe in CT therapy in my case, or that a course of this would make the symptoms magically disappear . . . Full of surprises my Doctor. He also said that if he did feel that there was no point in continuing looking for a diagnosis for my symptoms he would tell me. And I would listen. And I would trust him.

So back on the merry go round and off the garbage heap and not an umbrella in sight . . . .WHOOP WHOOP.

Tuesday 1 April 2008

Tagged - seven things

Eeeeek I have been tagged . . . seven things about myself - presumably interesting.

1) I was terrified of school, I really really REALLY hated it and hated it right through until I left at 16. I was permanently worried about my homework, I hated doing games. I was hopeless at Maths - although I did love English literature. I was constantly told by my teachers that I lacked confidence - so in the end I did.

2) I spent a lot of my working life working in Television as a VTR operator, an editor, I did a bit of editing. I worked with the studio, Telecine. I did alot of the titling graphics for clients on a machine called an Aston. I used to love my job and couldn't believe I was being paid from something I enjoyed so much. Then came the days of the take overs and suddenly money became more important than quality and the whole post production world turned into a cut throat business. My life was made hell by the company I worked for ( a well known commercial broadcast TV company who had taken over the wonderful company I had been working for) because I didn't fit in anymore and because I was an official in the TV union. In the end I got so fed up with the way I was subjected to regular snide put downs and abuse that I upped and walked out one day and then I sued the arse off the berludy company and got a generous out of court settlement. I have never worked for anyone since - the whole thing scarred me so much . . . then again I LOVE working for myself.

3) With one other VTR operator I did the first ever Sky Broadcast . . . then it only went out for two hours a night and not to the UK! Oh we had so much fun in the early days.

4) I have been married three times. I have obviously got it right now as I have been with HS for 22 years married and 26 years together.

5)I won a national hand writing competition when I was in Middle school and also got highly commended in a national poetry competition at about the same time I think. Also got short listed in the 90's for the One Voice writing competition . . .

6) I have loved animals ever since I was small and rescued a pigeon when I was eight - my first rescue. I ran a Rabbit rescue, for about four years and a Parrot Rescue. I have rescued rats and a ferret and sheep and chickens and cats and dogs and chinchillas . . . and so on . . .oh and of course Cyd my eyed Piranha.

7) I was told when I was in Junior school that I would grow up to be a writer . . . well I guess I did, but haven't had anything major published yet. I had a few minor bits and pieces published under Amber Hunt by Templar Publishing . . . think they are all out of print now and googling Amber Hunt does not bring up my name as my minor success was long before google . . . But I am now writing again - so who knows.

There I think you know enough about me now . . . Oh and I LOVE cheese and onion and marmalade toasted sandwiches - which I am really missing whilst I am on this wheat free diet.

I am not going to tag anyone - but as others have said if you fancy doing your seven things . . .then please consider yourself tagged.

My Best Friend

Today - the 1st April - is the day that HS and I met 26 years ago . . . and I just wanted to say thank you HS . . . you truly are my best friend . .Best April Fool I have ever had - before someone else says it . . .